About Steve Pavlina Taking His Forums Down
December 25, 2011
Broken Hearted
December 29, 2011

What I Think Of 2012 (And Other End Of The World Scares)

Remember how the world was going to end in the year 2000? Except it didn’t and those who bought into that just conveniently forgot about it quite soon after. Now it’s going to end in 2012, but this time it’s serious because the mayas said so or something.

Screw that.

I’m not a major channeller but I have intuition in the places in my life where it matters. I came to Barcelona pretty much on a whim and it was exactly where I needed to be. I’ve tried all sorts of things in my life but I’ve always gravitated towards what I need. My heart knows what’s going on.

I can’t bring down an archangel to give a big flowery speech about it. I find it hard enough to pick up individual words from non-physical entities. But I do know that my heart says I’m going to live for a long time.

I nearly died a couple of times. I just didn’t think about it back then but I came really, scarily close, and back then there wasn’t really much apparent hope that things would get better. I just didn’t think about dying cause I knew it wasn’t my time. And so it wasn’t.

I know other indigos who have been there. I know some who tried to kill themselves repeatedly. It never worked, because we’re here to do something, and nothing, not even the end of the world, is going to change that.

It’s not wishful thinking to say that I’m going to live for a long time. I’ve always been a little ambivalent about living here. I know I could live on a planet where I was drenched in love and peace and happiness and security all the time. I know this because I came from such a planet, and next life I could easily go back.

I know nothing holds me back from that but myself and the commitment I’ve made. Fuck karma, fuck “learning”. I came here to help out, I know it in the deepest fibre of my very being, and if I’m here it’s because I chose to do it with every last drop of my free will.

So I’m not dying in the next year. I also know there’s not going to be such incredible cataclysms that human society will break down. Not yet. Cause I know if I’m here it’s because I’m going to be able to do my mission in some capacity, and I can’t manage much if I’m one of a few straggling survivors of humanity fighting amongst each other to stay alive. If my life ever becomes solely about survival with no hope of improvement, I’ll give up on life and go somewhere else. I have better things to do than that.

That said I think the world will be seeing some shake-up. Well, it already is, isn’t it? It’s not going to stop being shaken up. I think it will get shaken up *more*. The process is going to continue.

But that’s okay. No lasting damage is going to be done by that. On the contrary, it’s going to be what we need to wake up collectively. I get a sort of slightly twisted pleasure to think about it. Twisted cause it’s not what people want, but it *is* what people need. And I like that. Screw people clinging to the systems and ways of life that are destroying them and the planet. Let those things burn to dust. I’ll stare into the fires with a pyromaniac glee.

And I’ll help out. Help the flames to burn hot and produce the light I came to co-create here. Help new things come out of the breakdown of the old. That’s what I’m here to do. So the world isn’t ending yet, sorry. Let’s stop wasting time and start worrying about something that matters.

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