I finally feel ready to write about what I call “spiritual parasites“, or what are more widely known as “Negative Attached Entities (NEAs)”. When I didn’t know what to call them I googled for “spiritual parasites”, so maybe by using this as my title I can help others find this information.
Spiritual parasites or negative attached entities are spirits which lodge in your body or aura and attempt to feed off your energy. Many people – including those who believe in spirits – will be resistant to this idea, but I’ve discovered in recent months that spiritual parasites absolutely do exist. I believed in spirits before, but was not expecting to find them inside my body – yet, I did.
My first conscious encounter with a spiritual parasite happened about half a year ago. As I recall, I had recently finished a cacao trip and started unexpectedly to feel really, really bad. I was sort of depressed and restless and felt weird and “wrong” for no reason I could imagine. I spent a long time, perhaps two hours, trying to deal with this feeling, without success. All my usual tools were useless. I tried meditating, analysing the feeling, talking about it, and so on. When I tried to get to the root of the feeling, there appeared to be no such root that I could discover.
Then something strange happened. As I was meditating into the part of my body where I sensed the feeling was coming from – a part of my body that happens to carry the lingering energy of a childhood trauma – I saw a little face in my mind’s eye, sort of two eyes and a mouth in the darkness. This face was laughing at me. It was gloating about how it had succeeded in hurting me. I couldn’t really believe what I was seeing, but I did the only thing I could think of – I went through my best guess at what an exorcism would look like. “By the power of Jesus Christ, Buddha and all that is holy, leave me!”. Amazingly, in no more than half a minute, my negative state vanished – completely. After two hours of trying everything, it was suddenly so easily over.
In the aftermath, me and my partner discussed what this meant. Both of us were a little resistent to believing it could really be what it looked like, but for me it was hard to come to any other conclusion, if understanding things this way produced such a radical effect. No other psychological tool I’ve found could have this effect. While I might have been ready to forget about this if this was the only time this happened, further encounters only reinforced my conclusion. If negative attached entities are not real, then what could possibly have caused this to happen?
Of course, if you’re invested in not believing, then you will find a way not to believe, no matter what. But the typical skeptical explanations don’t make things more clear. There is no answer so clear and elegant to this problem than saying “well, it looks like a duck, it walks like a duck, so it’s a duck.”
The second time I encountered a spiritual parasite was a few months later. I hadn’t really incorporated my understanding of these creatures into my practice yet – my previous experience had just seemed like a random anomaly. So I wasn’t prepared for this one either.
That night, I took MDMA. I find MDMA extremly useful for spiritual purposes – when I’m on the drug is the only time I normally have a very clear connection with my spirit guides and with Tina. It seems, MDMA doesn’t just open me to positive spirits, however.
This MDMA trip started well. Tina appeared early on, without me calling for her, and in my mind’s eye I saw her passing me three gifts. One looked like a clock – no, a compass. At that point I didn’t know what it was for, but I took it.
My partner was in the room with me. Later on, I had the impulse to attempt a healing on them. I tapped a certain part of their body. Suddenly, I started feeling bad – really bad. My connection with my spirit guides disappeared after a minute or so. Their last message for me was “go for a walk”. I didn’t take their advice for a long time, struggling with my awful feeling and a feeling of lethargy, until my partner reminded me that I should really listen to them. I went for a walk. Moving seemed to help a bit, though I still felt terrible.
At some point as I walked, however, I was looking inside me and noticed – a vision just like the last time, except this time it was three faces; and again they were laughing, gloating at me. They said, “We’re going to be a voice in your head and make you think you’re insane!”. They seemed pleased at this prospect.
I knew what to do then. I cast them out with an exorcism, and again, almost immediately, I felt better.
The day afterwards, I visualised Tina’s compass in my hand and asked her what it was for. She simply told me to look at it. I noticed the hand of the compass pointed in a certain direction, and intuitively, I knew it was showing me where spiritual parasites were in my body. I did some work that night attempting to clear the spirits out with willpower, and as I slept had a wonderful lucid dream full of light and space.
I even had another small negative entity attachment while recovering from the MDMA. I was out shopping and started to get into another low, negative mood that I seemingly had no power to shift, and couldn’t identify the source of. I was starting to get a bit wiser now, and ejected the spiritual parasite quickly. This time I didn’t even bother saying an exorcism; my willpower alone seemed to be enough.
From then on, I started to get really interested in negative entity attachments and look for information. I found the book, “Dark Angels” by Rita Louise, and slowly absorbed it, finding it to be incredibly helpful. I’ve also read some websites including SacredSerpents.com. Besides that, I did my own work as I felt guided by my intuition.
In the beginning, I thought that all attached entities could be removed simply with an act of will. This seems to be the case with some of them, but as I discovered with Tina’s compass, I definitely couldn’t remove them all in a single session. I’ve since come to the conclusion that becoming totally parasite free will take a serious amount of work, a work that I’m still engaging in. (SacredSerpents suggests that this could be the work of a year or more).
That said, it does seem like some parasites can be removed with nothing but the use of will. It seems I need to locate them in my body and exercise just a bit of mental pressure, and they “pop out”. This seems especially the case when they are actively creating intensely negative feelings for me.
One time, this time apparently not catalysed by the use of any drug, I started being really angry at my partner. I had had a reason to be angry, but this feeling was out of proportion to the reason, and went on for a very long time, despite me not wanting it to be there, diligently avoiding acting on it, and working on changing it. After about half an hour of fruitless efforts, my partner suggested a now familiar phrase, “Have you tried treating it like a parasite?”. Despite feeling some resistance and skepticism, I gave it a go. Surprisingly, it “popped out” and suddenly I felt okay again – freaked out at what had just happened, but normal otherwise.
Another time, I noticed a presence in my body when paying attention to my feelings of hunger. I tried “treating it like a parasite”, and I felt a light sense of relief. It took me a while to be certain, but within a couple of days I was sure: I had healed my compulsive eating – the difference was radical! Before, I needed to eat a lot of food, heavy food, to feel full, and the feeling of being too hungry (for instance, if I skipped a meal) was unbearable. I would overeat just to avoid that feeling, and I felt that dieting would be genuinely psychologically impossible for me. I had gotten up to 115 kilos and was beginning to despair a bit as there was no end in sight for the weight gain. In one moment of lucidity, I had decided that I had probably starved to death in a past life, as the intense nervousness I had around food suggested that for me, at each meal, my life depended on it. I now believe that probably that attached spirit had starved to death in a past life. (In Rita Louise’s book, a similar case is mentioned with someone who was bulimic and could be cured just as instantly as I was).
Two months later or so, I’m now at 103 kilos. Siezing my opportunity, I started an intense diet, losing 9 kilos in the first month. I’m now taking it a bit more easy, regaining my energy for another push. I already find it much easier to tackle long flights of stairs, which is already a relief.
Another time, I decided to take MDMA again and, with my new knowledge, attempted to protect myself well, visualising protections around me and asking for angelic help, as well as clearing the energy of the space I was staying at at the time. Well, I succeded in clearing the energy of the room itself very well, but I think I had failed to do so well enough in the toilet. I had a good trip until the first time I went to the toilet, upon which I started losing my connection and feeling kind of bad. I didn’t feel intensely bad like previous times, so probably the protection was still of some use, but the extremely valuable state of the MDMA disappeared, which was incredibly frustrating. I don’t know why it took me so long to remember, but I finally “treated it like a parasite” and returned to a more positive state, though I didn’t manage to return to channelling in that session.
I later had a conversation with the spirit who was in the bathroom and discovered it to be a ghost. I attempted to help it, and thought to tell it it was dead, as I know that some ghosts remain stuck because they don’t understand their situation. This seemed to bring about a shocked “aha!” look on his face, and with a little encouragement he was able to go into the light and stop haunting a toilet, which I suspect was a serious improvement.
Despite some spirits “popping out” easily, some seem to be harder to shift. In Rita Louise’s book, she seems to talk about those ones. As my first experiences – the experiences which convinced me that spiritual parasites were real – were with “popping out” spirits, it took me a while first to accept the existence of, and start to learn to deal with, the tougher ones.
Rita Louise suggests talking with an attached entity. Ask it what it is, where it comes from, what does it need. In my limited experience, I’ve talked with a couple of spirits that essentially said, “fuck off”. They wanted to feed on me and didn’t have any interest in negotiating. However, I’ve now encountered two spirits who I could move out of me by talking it over and finding a solution.
Not to long ago, I noticed that I was having trouble grounding energy. My energy wouldn’t flow between my heart and the lower chakras, and couldn’t get to the ground easily. On closer examination this “block” seemed to be literally something lodged in there – someone.
It wasn’t a strong presence. With a little willpower I could easily move it from my heart to my hand to talk to it more comfortably. (Rita Louise suggests moving spirits a bit away so that you can negotiate with them). I sensed it to be a simple consciousness, not much more aware than an animal, but less aware than a baby. After puzzling over this a moment I realised, it was a fetus. Its needs were simple; it had stuck in me for a sense of security, and told me it wanted to “sleep”.
I sent it energy, reiki style, and attempted to help it cross over to the other side of the veil by imagining a portal. I hoped to encourage it to return to its higher self, which I supposed was what it needed. It took some work, but eventually I saw the spirit in a space with stars and nebulas, a representation to me of the Universe or God. It was connected to God by an umbilical cord, and a protective shell appeared around it. It had passed over and begun its process of moving on.
Another time, I discovered a spirit lodged in my third chakra area when working on forgiveness. It seemed to be a small, angry presence, not dangerous seeming but vigorous and enraged. I saw it shaking its arms and yelling. As I enquired into it, it told me it was a forest spirit, which had attached to me when I was hiking with my parents as a teenager. I remembered the hiking trip. I had been in a beautiful environment but everything felt absolutely wrong with the world; despite not having a clear focus for my discontent, I felt emotionally awful.
Apparently, it hadn’t really wanted to attach to me, or perhaps not for so long; what I could understand from it was, that it had wanted to feed on me but had made some kind of mistake. It hadn’t quite understood what I was… or something like that. I suppose such a creature’s mind works in rather different ways to mine, and it is a bit hard to find a common context with which to understand what it says.
In any case, it suggested I could let it out in a forest. I promised to do so, and indeed a few days ago I happened to go to a forest near Berlin. I asked it if it wanted to leave now, and in fact it did come out of my body, and, with buzzing, insect-like wings flew cautiously a few metres above my head and looked around. I sensed it was rather absorbed in its environment, but wasn’t quite ready to commit to leaving me. Indeed, as I got up to leave from that spot, it quickly jumped back into my body. Apparently, it preferred ancient forest, not replanted monoculture forest (and who can blame it?).
As I continued walking, I talked to the spirit in my mind. I let it know that I would remove it at the first opportunity, and if it was unlucky that might be in a city. It thought about this for a while and decided to leave. Maybe this was a bit mean, but I didn’t feel like making a special journey across the country just for a parasitic entity that was invading my personal space as a matter of course.
Now, what to do about entities that respond to my attempts at communication with nothing but a “fuck off”?
I’m still learning ways. I believe there could be “brute force” methods, using plenty of willpower, energy and focus. And perhaps there are subtler methods. What I’ve heard, which I think might be true, is that all negative attached entities find some negative part of their host to latch onto. So if you could heal this part, it would have no foothold, and could be then “popped out”. Perhaps, indeed, those spirits which I could so far “pop out” easily had already lost their foothold, because of my constant personal development and self healing work. It seems like a reasonable theory.
There is a spirit I have been working on which I discovered attached to my back. It looks like a giant insect like creature with big claws digging into my back and a wasp like stinger constantly stuck into my back. I’ve succeeded in detaching two of its four set of claws and the stinger, so far.
While the creature wasn’t interested in talking with me, I found that I could intuitively understand it to some extent without its help. I saw that it was generating thoughts and feelings of heaviness, slowness, over-seriousness and un-joy. I recognise these energies as things that I want to shift, and remember a time in my life when I was more joyful and light. I believe the spirit attached around when I went into a deep depression at age fourteen.
My strategy was this: focus on the thoughts and feelings which I want to have, and see the thoughts and feelings which the creature contributes as “not me”. By understanding when a thought is not mine, it’s suddenly easy to ignore it. Perhaps better said, making the distinction between me and it – the distinction itself creates a seperation, weakens its hold over me.
So I’ve been working on moving into a new energy, and I think I’m definitely succeeding, even if it is some work. I believe I will eventually remove this thing completely.
In general, I find inner body meditation to be helpful both for identifying spirits and for, I think, loosening their hold on me. As I breathe, I sort of imagine a gust of air moving through the inside of my body. For those who understand what I mean, I “breathe inside the different parts of my body”. I focus on different parts of my body in turn, trying to experience my consciousness as being within a hollow space within me, bordered by my skin. Where I find it harder to “breathe into” this area, I might notice a darkness or a presence. I suspect these are all spiritual parasites, and I endeavour to breathe into those areas anyway, pushing the presence away with my own presence. I might affirm, “I am intensely present in every part of my body and there is no room for negative entities”.
What I’ve not found to be super effective is the standard willpower exorcism method when the spirit shows itself too deeply rooted to be “popped out”. I’ve decided that if I end up having to use so much willpower that it gets stressful and uncomfortable, the technique is probably not going to be sustainable for the length of time I would need to continue it. Instead I’ve been currently working with a mix of the above two methods – making a distinction, and breathing into my body.
I’ve gotten some slightly conflicting information from different sources about negative attached entities. Erin Pavlina, who I follow, mentions that she has seen about 20 people with genuine entity attachments in her work as a psychic. She seems to think they are rare. Her advice for removing them, while theoretically good, also doesn’t go nearly as far into detail as I would consider necessary.
Rita Louise, in her book, suggests that 20-30% of people have an entity attachment. She says you are most likely to get one if you have been a victim of trauma and/or have been messing around with spiritual stuff without knowing what you’re doing. (Whoops… I guess that’s me).
Sakti of SacredSerpents.com suggests that 99% of people have spiritual parasites. Essentially, according to them, if you haven’t done extensive work to remove parasites, you have them, guaranteed. Though I don’t completely resonate with everything Sakti says, I suspect that this part might be true. Sakti is trained in the Shamanic tradition, and as I understand in the Shamanic tradition spiritual parasites are a big aspect of sickness and healing. I’ve read about spirits being removed by shamans with the help of Ayahuasca*, for example. I feel drawn to exploring more from this tradition.
*I have also heard of people getting spirit attachments from Ayahuasca, presumably from ceremonies that were poorly protected, so I am rather cautious about this.
Another conflict I’ve seen is that Rita Louise suggests that negative attached entities are usually in your aura but not your body, with only cases of actual posession being in your body. Sakti talks about spirits being in the body without being possessors. In my intuition, I’ve seen spirits that were both attached to my body and in my body, though perhaps the explanation is that what I was seeing in my body was some kind of energetic anchor they placed in me, I don’t know.
Long time readers might know that I have a trauma from being beaten as a child. While I no longer usually have trauma dreams, and no longer need to constantly prove that I’m stronger than would-be authoritarians, the trauma isn’t completely gone, and I still do feel it in the part of the body where I was beaten, especially in moments of humiliation or self hatred.
Despite having a feeling of progress, a final solution to this issue has been elusive. However, recently I was in a small emotional crisis. I was feeling the weight of existence, and the desire not to exist (which wasn’t quite suicidality but I know it’s on that spectrum of feelings). When I examined that feeling, I discovered part of the sensation was in my trauma area, and with that insight, I realised the desire not to exist was a sort of self hatred, a continuation of the force of annihilation my father visited on me. I breathed into the area, and affirmed that the impulse came from a spirit, not from me. I did not want to have this self disgust. I wanted to have a more normal feeling, a feeling of lightness, of comfort in existence. I tried to imagine that, imagine what my authentic feeling without the influence of the spirit would have. And with this work, I began to feel that feeling. I had a rare feeling of normality in my trauma area, possibly for the first time, or at the very least for one of the few times I’ve ever felt such a thing. I didn’t feel the sort of catharsis that would come from a complete healing, but I did feel a contrast between “me” and the influence of the spirit, and I felt its influence weaken.
From my experience so far, I believe understanding spiritual parasites may be a key to advancing the way we deal with our spiritual development, our emotional health, and our physical health. It may be that I will soon clear my lingering trauma energy, and it may be that I could never have done that without discovering this aspect of reality. Negative attached entities are real, and they are a big big deal.
Luckily, as I’ve seen, they have the most power over you when you do not notice them. Knowledge in this case is absolutely power. Sometimes, knowledge is all you need, as I’ve found with the spirits that “popped out”. Other times, it’s still at the very least half of the solution. So at least in that regard, we can be optimistic.