April 23, 2017

My Fifth Trans Birthday

It’s now been five years since I started living as female, despite the role I was born into. There’s not so much to write anymore about the topic. I still have to finish my voice training and hair removal, which are both at a comfortably good stage but need a bit more work. And I still have yet to get genital surgery, and don’t really want to think about how long it will take as […]
April 22, 2017

Welcome Home, Wanderer

My new book, Welcome Home, Wanderer, is now available! This book is essentially a self help guide for those who identify as indigo, crystal, or similar. These people are “aliens on a mission”, intensely idealistic souls who often find it hard to come to terms with the way things work on this planet. As “indigo” is an inexact term, I also encourage use of the term “Wanderer” in my book. You can read more about […]
April 19, 2017

Psychoactive Cacao

This may sound surprising to you but here it is: Cacao can be a drug, and I personally find it to be one of the most useful drugs for personal and spiritual development I’ve ever encountered. The secret is this: for cacao to be a drug, it needs to be raw, something that doesn’t normally happen. Cacao made for food consumption is always treated with heat. Online and in health food stores, you can find […]
March 15, 2017

Unpublishing My Book “Stubborn Soul”

After two years, I’m choosing now to unpublish my self published book “Stubborn Soul”. Stubborn Soul was an autobiographical book detailing my harsh and unusual life until I was 18 years old. I suppose my decision might seem strange. Why remove your book, even if it doesn’t sell well, when it doesn’t take energy to maintain and occasionally gives you a bit of money here and there? Such reasoning held me back for some time, […]
March 7, 2017

Choosing The Label “Lesbian” Over Bisexual

I’ve identified with the label bisexual for about six years with different levels of certainty. Sometimes I’ve been very unsure and have strongly entertained the idea that I might be lesbian instead. Sometimes I’ve been relatively comfortable in my identity. I’ve almost always been clear on the fact that I like women more then men, but that wouldn’t necessarily mean I’m not bisexual; bisexual people with preferences either way do exist. Strangely, after my longest […]
February 26, 2017

Non Violent Self Motivation

I’ve written before about my work developing what I call non violent self motivation. I’ve called it “unjobbing” in the past – a parallel to “unschooling” which refers to a non violent form of parenting – but I think this name is clearer and also has the benefit of not requiring you to understand the term “unschooling”. For those who haven’t read about it before, non violent self motivation means ideally never forcing yourself to […]
February 16, 2017

The Power of Soft Habits

It’s crept up on me, but I seem to have become more healthy: I’m usually having a big fruit smoothie for breakfast every morning, I’m usually swimming once a week, and I usually meditate every day. I’m also now trying to add a new habit to the list: one big salad every day. We still have to see if that one sticks, but I’m hopeful. I know for many people this would not be a […]
January 24, 2017

Eliminating Distractions From Facebook

The night before last, I made a radical change to how I use Facebook, removing distracting elements and focusing it entirely on my real-life social life. Making a change like this may not seem like a big deal, but Facebook had been consuming very large quantities of my time, so the way I relate with it as a tool has a big significance to my life as a whole. Some years back I attempted a […]
January 16, 2017

Anger And Nonviolent Communication

I had a conversation about dealing with anger yesterday and found that my views on the topic have developed, or at least, I seem to be better at explaining them. Interestingly, though I still haven’t read the book Nonviolent Communication, I’ve been told that my philosophy seems to match its ideas closely. I’d like to read it, but I like the idea of writing down my ideas first, so that they are not influenced by […]
January 5, 2017

Self Care With Green Smoothies

A while ago I posted about getting a high power blender. I mostly planned to use it for food-nerdy things, such as making nut butters and obscure gluten free flours, but surprisingly (to me) I found myself using it every day for its primary intended purpose: green smoothies. I used to try to follow a low fat raw food diet (specifically the 80/10/10 diet, if you want to look it up). I failed with the […]
December 28, 2016

How Industry Responds To You Giving Up Meat

I have sometimes heard the argument against veganism that even if you don’t buy meat, the shops will still stock the same amount and what you don’t buy will just get thrown away. I do see where this is coming from; there is a lot of waste in the food industry and probably one person no longer buying meat from a shop will not cause them to adjust the amounts they order. However, I do […]
December 9, 2016

Getting A Bianco Forte Blender

Basically ever since I heard of it, so I guess at least since 5 years ago, I wanted a high power blender. The most well known one is the Vitamix, which costs 700€. That wasn’t easy for me to pay, so I’ve spent a long time wanting but not having. Recently, I got annoyed at it always being “later” and started thinking “what if I could now?”. Long story short, I found an equivalent blender, […]
November 19, 2016

Fear Vs. Joy

A while ago, a very cute friend of mine made a post on her Facebook wall. (Hi Phoenix!) The post said something like, “If you had three wishes granted by a genie, what would they be?” I started replying to that question in a comment, and had an interesting realisation. At the moment, I could only think of one thing that I would want to achieve in this magical, effortless way: money. Other things are […]
October 23, 2016

Ego Death On MDMA

About six weeks ago, I had an incredibly powerful growth experience. It is testament to the craziness of my life that I can say it wasn’t my most intense single growth experience, but it surely ranks up there with the best of them. It was instigated by the consumption of the drug MDMA. I’ve so far taken psychadelic drugs four times in my life; psilocybin mushrooms twice and MDMA twice now. The psilocybin was interesting, and I […]
August 27, 2016

Family In A Feminist World

Feminism has so far done very well in allowing and encouraging women to do things that were traditionally in the male sphere, e.g. earning money, not having babies, wearing trousers (pants) and so on. There’s a problem now, though, in that there has been almost no reciprocal movement, allowing or encouraging men to be stay at home parents, to wear skirts, and so on. Julia Serano would point out that this is to with a subtle […]
August 26, 2016

I Hate David Wolfe

I generally prefer to avoid inflammatory language in my writing. Philosophically, I try to avoid any sort of violence, which includes psychic violence. But we all need a holiday sometimes, so fuck David Wolfe. Fuck David Wolfe for stuff like this: and for stuff like this: …but most of all, fuck him for being a scam artist. David Wolfe made huge amounts of money by trying to convince people to buy “Superfoods”. Superfoods are interesting because they […]
August 26, 2016

Is The Hijab Oppressive? Yes, But You’re Missing Something…

The hijab – is it oppressive or not? The trouble with this debate is that when non-Muslim people are talking, it morphs into something else entirely. The need to end the requirement for hijab – which I think all reasonable feminists should agree upon – becomes the paternalistic need to force women not to wear a hijab; hence the new law in France. And the criticism of an aspect of a culture becomes an attack on the culture – […]
July 4, 2016

My Second Psilocybin Mushroom Trip

I had my second psilocybin mushroom trip recently. My interest in psychadelics comes from their potential for helping me with my personal growth. In particular, I became interested in psilocybin (magic) mushrooms since reading about their supposed potential for healing PTSD. I still feel influenced by certain traumas, so the thought that a drug could help lift that weight sounds very appealing. My first mushroom trip was complicated. (You can read about it here). The […]
June 4, 2016

Ethical Mathematics And The Value Of Animal Life

I saw this post recently on Facebook: “Post-mortem examinations of the thirteen North Sea sperm whales recently stranded on the coast of Germany revealed that their stomachs were full of plastic. #WorldOceansDay #PlasticPollution” (From Mission Blue) Looking at the image, and feeling my immediate emotional reaction to it, got me thinking. I find this image especially touching and shocking. More than images of dead animals and even of dead humans. This may be partly because […]
April 27, 2016

Ending The Cycle Of Violence

I think most of us understand the concept of “don’t be an asshole”. If we all simply lived by this precept, life would be so much better. Pity, then, that there are so many people out there who act like assholes, spoiling it for everyone! I think the problem is that most people, when they act like assholes, don’t think they’re being assholes. They think they are justified. Now, from where we, as observers, stand, we don’t see […]